Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Paris Hilton Has Found The Lord!

Can I get a "Halle-fucking-lujah???

Apparently, the rigors of her incarceration have induced in the formerly frivolous and flighty and publically fucking heiress a sense of her own mortality and immorality. According to Bawbwa Wawa, on The View, the notoriously naughty fornicatrix has found the Lord inside the joint, and will--she avers--change her evil ways when she's released from durance vile.

Not only has the weepy wench discovered the Lord, she apparently has found her social conscience, and will use some part of her enormous inheritance to found theater workshops for disadvantaged youth.

Ah, the power of a the Law.

I used to catch a lot of grief from students and fellow faculty members when I suggested to them that it would be a salutory experience if every child--but especially the children of privilege and comfort, such as Ms Hilton--should experience a full-on, big-time, assume-the-position, serious-as-a-heart-attack cop encounter--either by a good cop on a bad day, or by a bad cop ANY day. We should all know what it is we authorize our "authorities" to do to "prevent" crime...


Tena said...

I so fucking agree.

Sure she found Jesus - they all do. Every fucking one of them - criminals I mean, and especially women.

We are the weaker vessel you know - we're always just looking to be redeemed. See, this is what happens when your culture is so saturated with that idea that it is considered reasonable.

The only guy I can think of who would act this way, and actually he never did, is Robert Downey, Jr. But he's fucking brilliant and poor damn Paris is so fucking stupid it's hard to know how she breathes on her own.

I can't stand the little bint, but I have to admit, she's a product. She didn't do this to herself, really. It was done to her.

You want to know our problem in this country? That's it - WE ARE ALL COMMODITIES.

Hecate said...

What Tena said.

Anonymous said...

She didn't find "God", she just found a new publicist.

Oh, and a hearty good morning to the ladies.

notwatchingtelevision said...

My consciousness was blessedly Paris free until the now-she's-in/now-she's not affair. Finally I succumbed and tried to find out who she is by watching an episode of her show.

She and her sidekick were "counselors" at a fat camp, and there were a couple of moments when they actually seemed sensitive.

The final night all the campers went through a ceremony where they ritually gave up some favored edible -- Twinkies, chips, etc. Since Paris and the other one don't have weight problems they gave up something else they were fond of, sunglasses for the little one and lip gloss for Paris.

Then, in the ceremonial finale, all the given over items were put in a basket attached to a bunch of helium-filled balloons to be set adrift. Just before the balloons were cut loose Paris and her bud snatched back their shades and lipstick. And that was it.

This whole reality-tv-celeb barbie thing, I just don't get. -- SP

Tena said...

Woody - I started a blog. Yeah, I did. I finally figured out why I was blocked - it was because I couldn't say what I need to say on a group blog. So, .

Tena said...

Son of a bitch - why didn't that post?

Tena said...

Your comments won't let me post a link, but they show up in preview. I am so confused.

It's Casa de NoDamnWay, tenah@blogspot.com.

mogwai said...

great point on "authorizing authority".

nolocontendere said...

I feel so ashamed at how glad I was that this priveleged rich snot cried her way to the slammer.
Well, maybe not.

Uileam said...

Hah, the title of her picture is nip-slip

Uileam said...

And now I have a link to Tena.

Uileam said...

I guess I'm too dumb to get to Tena's site.