Sunday, February 11, 2007

Larry Flynt's magazines don't hold a candle to the Lord's original work!

Contrary to popular liberal belief, promiscuity and deviance are not modern cultural creations but have their roots much deeper in human history.
Take this quiz to see how: Here's the first five questions...

1. If you retain the services of a prostitute, but are careless and
impregnate her, what should you do for her in return?

A. Nothing. Prostitution is a sin that makes the woman equally
culpable for the pregnancy.
B. Pay child support until the woman marries or the child reaches the
age of maturity, whichever comes earlier.
C. Kill the Godless whore! (particularly if you find out she’s a relative).
D. None of the above.

2. Were sex objects used in Biblical times?

A. They may have been, but that’s certainly not something we’d learn
from the Bible.
B. Yes. Women masturbated themselves with dildos made of gold and
C. No. People in Biblical times were aware only of sex with animate
objects, such as humans and animals.
D. None of the above.

3. Do Middle Eastern men have large “external appendages” and
great sexual prowess?

A.Whether they do or not, this is certainly not a subject the Bible
would dare address.
B. No. Differential size and performance is a media myth.
C. Yes. In fact, Egyptians have penises the size of a donkey’s and
ejaculations the volume of a horse’s.
D. Yes. Jews are really small.

4. How can sin (or anything else that irks God) affect your sex life?

A. Trick question. God doesn’t manipulate one’s sex life as a
punishment for sin.
B. Depending upon his anger, God may make you impotent.
C. While you won’t be impotent, you may lose the ability to produce
D. God may simply have your neighbor rape your wife.

5. Are there times when prostitution is acceptable?

A. Yes. When the money raised is used to support needy Christians.
B. No. The Bible never refers to “acceptable” prostitution.
C. Yes. If the prostitute is providing “services” to a widower.
D. None of the above.

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