Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Note To Self: Hire This Shaller Fella If You Ever Wanna Run

This is pretty close to brilliant, if you're an Obama partisan.
A CHEKLIST FOR BARACK

Herewith, a half dozen suggestions of things Barack Obama could do this week to improve his chances on Super Tuesday:
1. For the next week, only refer to the Clintons in the plural, as in “The Clintons” or “my three opponents in this race, John Edwards and The Clintons.” Lines like these will get you a lot of media play and will force Hillary to respond to questions about her independence by asserting that she, not they, is the candidate—a response that will then also get a lot of play, and take her off her experience/ready-to-lead-on-day-one message.
2. On Wednesday, ask Democrats rhetorically why Karl Rove and other top Republicans (see George Packer’s New Yorker piece last week, e.g.) seem to be hoping against hope that they don’t draw the candidate with the hopeful message in the general, but instead want Hillary to win the nomination.
3. On Thursday night during the Los Angeles debate, remind Latino voters that one of your campaign slogans from both the 2004 senate bid and your current presidential bid--“yes, we can”-- happens to roughly translate to “Si, se puede.” Then make a joke about yourself (humor being your weak spot, as the smart folks at Slate’s “gabfest” podcast correctly observed this week) being a gringo who knows little more than those three words in Spanish--but how those three matter most.
4. On Friday, roll out your wife Michele for a big speech about women’s issues that serves as a powerful reminder that when Hillary Clinton says all the candidates are blessed to have talented spouses, she isn’t lying.
5. Call Al Gore, promise him the Moon if necessary, tell him it’s time to get off the sidelines, and roll him out as an endorsement on Saturday, in time for the Sunday talk shows. Unlike four years ago with Howard Dean (when Gore’s approval numbers were a mere fraction of what they are today), this endorsement would matter.
6. On Monday, talk about how you, as nominee, would make it a special focus not only to campaign hard on your own behalf, but to provide substantial effort and resources to swing congressional states and districts, specifically the two dozen open House seats created by Republican retirements or deaths.

--Tom Schaller
Me? I reckon that'd seal the deal, if the deal were actually gonna get sealed.

2 comments:

Sparkle Plenty said...

What I find funny is how many times I've heard Senator Clinton's surrogates refer to this or that positive condition we experienced under "the Clintons" during the 90s.

BlakNo1 said...

I can't even vote for Kucinich or Edwards on Super Tuesday now.

Fuck.