Previews: The Hormuz Express

Sy Hersch alleged in an interview with one of the ThinkProgress guys that Cheney's brain trust tried to cook up a causus belli with Iran by getting US Navy Seals dressed up as Iranians to drive boats, built in the us, to simulate an attack on a USer Carrier group in or near the Straits of Hormuz, to which the Murkins would respons and initiate hostilities. The Gulf of Tonkin came immediately to mind, and I thought "It's not a fucking game, motherfuckers." But I'm old.

Then a TP poster, Bobwurst, picked up the ball:

I think the plan is for the pretend Iranians to “attack” a US warship and then have the warship “defend” itself by blowing up the navy seals. To what extent the seals or the warship would be in on the true intention of the “attack” questionable. I could see this administration telling the seals that they’re just going to be filmed “attacking” and that there will be live fire but they wouldn’t be targeted, and then the administration would not tell the warship, who would blow up the unsuspecting seals thinking they were really under attack. This would eliminate witnesses to bush/cheney’s treason, and would make the testimony of the captain and crew more believable: they wouldn’t have to act because they would have believed they were really under attack.

I though this was just freaking/farking/farouking brilliant and I posted back:
I give you "Hormuz Express," starring Harrison Ford as the Carrier commander and Bruce Willis leading the Seals…awesome, dood!
Bobwurst replied, getting right into the swing:

Except that Willis, alone, would have to survive, and swim home on the back of a shark to America bent on revenge. He’d shark-surf up the Potomac, climb the fence to the Whitehouse and sneak into President Biff Stoneman’s (D) bedroom (Fred Thompson);..who would spill the beans just before a bullet fired through the window by the Russian Mafia (sent by the Evil VP, played by Brian Denehy) hits him in the head and splatters his brains on the protrait of Bush43 over the bed. Willis again barely escapes, after a bloody and explosive chase through the streets of Washington.

After escaping by hailing his shark, and swimming through the sewers to Annapolis, he sneaks his way onto Harrison Ford’s ship and they decide to save America from the evil Democrat party. I don’t want to ruin the ending, but it involves Denehey being impaled on one of the spikes on the headdress of the statue of liberty.

I've already sent a Bobwurst a contract, and I'm starting the 'treatment' today!